When All Else Fails

If you’re an atheist you’ve most certainly had the “deep down inside” tactic thrown your way. While it’s occasionally a last-ditch argument when all else fails, most commonly it’s the only weapon in the arsenal of an ill-equipped (or lazy) evangelizing Christian.

Having no meat on its bone, this stunning example of ineffectual and transparent Christian logic falls into the same category as that classic third grade schoolyard comeback, “I know what you are, but what am I?”

Very effective.

Turning Tables

This is how it works. Your existence as an atheist comes with the assumption that god doesn’t exist and the implication that having such silly beliefs borders on clinical delusion.

Being so religiously insecure and incapable of walking away basking in their own perceived truth yet having no ability or fortitude to wage any kind of meaningful, lucid, or logically coherent defense of their belief, they respond with the most flaccid of retorts:

“I think that deep down inside you know that god exists but…”

Choose one (or more) of the following:

• you don’t want to be held accountable to him.
• you’re afraid of what you don’t understand.
• you’re afraid of looking silly.

Wow. I mean, with logic like this how could they possibly be wrong?

Burning Tables

Okay, so it’s clear that this is just a textbook knee-jerk response to the implication (if not expressly stated position) that they’re delusional. Yes, I know what you are but what am I?

But just to get a reaction and enjoy a few minutes of gleeful, childish antagonism, my turn-table response is as follows:

“I think that deep down inside you know that god DOESN’T exist but…”

Choose all of the following:

• you don’t want to be held personally accountable for your mistakes and inadequacies.
• you’re afraid of what you don’t understand.
• you’re afraid of looking silly before your god-believing friends and family.

And furthermore:

• you’re too much of a coward to live your life with unanswered questions.
• you’re too much of a coward to accept that there’s no “master plan” or purpose to life.
• you’re too much of a coward to accept the finality of life.
• you’re too much of a coward to live your life knowing that when they die you will NEVER see your loved ones again – not in this life or the next.

Anytime you hear the “deep down inside” response know that the only enlightenment revealed is the religious insecurity that lives [...wait for it...] “deep down inside.”
 

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